


You Are In Love

by MHMoony



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Pre-Kingsman: The Secret Service, i would lay down my life for both of these men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-09
Updated: 2019-12-09
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:27:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21736825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MHMoony/pseuds/MHMoony
Summary: A glimpse into the first year of James and Percival’s relationship.
Relationships: James | Lancelot/Percival (Kingsman)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 25





	You Are In Love

**31 December 1998, London, Percival’s Home**

1998 has been the most stressful, wonderful, downright dramatic year of James Spencer’s life. It’s difficult, even now, to feel as though he deserves his position as Kingsman’s Lancelot; he knows that had Lee not been brave, he would be the one graced with this title instead. On himself, James feels like a liar. A fraud. Undeserving. Perhaps that’s the reason for his ostentatious ways during his missions. If he can show that he had succeeded, then being graced with the name  _ Lancelot _ could feel more his own, more rightfully his.

“You’re Lancelot,” he hears a soft voice say.

Looking up from his spot on the sette, James sets his eyes from the crackling fire to the owner of that voice, and a small smile settled on his lips.

One of the best things to happen in 1998 is sitting across from him.

“You wouldn’t have been made Lancelot if you didn’t deserve it.”

James’s smile fades away. “I wouldn’t have been made Lancelot if Lee didn’t go and sacrifice himself.”

“No,” Percy says as he shakes his head. “You are here, James. You were brought into Kingsman. You made it through the trials.” 

He takes a pause, and James notices his brows furrow slightly. He looks back into the hearth, the flames dancing about gently in the darkened room.

“Lee wouldn’t have been able to shoot his dog.”

James looks abruptly up at Percy, his eyes wide. Percy, however, is as calm as ever. “I beg your pardon? Did you just say  _ shoot his dog _ ?”

Percy nods serenely, as though he hadn’t just said one of the most ridiculous sentences James had ever heard, and considering the words that came out of his own mouth, James would have thought that quite impressive had his mind not been preoccupied with  _ shooting a dog _ .

“Yes. The final Kingsman test is shooting your dog. You, I believe, are the only exception to the trials. Lee, while a loyal and dedicated man, had too soft of a heart to be able to willingly shoot something he had grown attached to.”

James stares incredulously at him. “And what makes  _ you  _ think I could have shot Princess Grace?”

Something shifts in Percy’s eyes, and James feels his stomach swoop. “Because you’re a very trusting person, James Spencer.”

James smiles and looks at him fondly. Or is it with pure adoration? Possibly both. Lord knows he’s feeling both of those and everything in between at the moment. 

The clock sitting atop the mantlepiece rings loudly, breaking James from his musings. 

“Happy New Year, James.”

James smiles. “Happy New Year, Percy.”

“Come on, then,” Percy says standing up. He walks over to James and places a hand on his shoulder. “I think I’d like to start this new year with a cup of coffee. Would you like some?”

“Yes, thank you,” James says. He stands up and watches Percy walk out of the sitting room. He looks down at the chain around his neck, the one that Percy had gotten him for Christmas. The gift that went along with the beginning of  _ them _ . The flickering from the fire reflects off the shiny metal, and James once again feels a jolt inside him.

1999, it seems, will begin with Percy and coffee at midnight, and James wouldn’t have it any other way.

\---

**3 February 1999, Kingsman Estate**

James walks into the library of the estate, needing a moment of peace before heading back to the shop for his debrief with Arthur. He plops himself on one of the couches and sighs. Behind him, he hears a ruffle of pages, and turns around. There, sitting in an armchair, is Percy, his eyes completely focused on the book in his hands, not even noticing that he had entered the room.

Looking down to see what he was reading, James feels his heart swell.  _ Maurice _ by E.M. Forster. He had mentioned it to Percy that weekend when they were having dinner together that it was his favourite book of all time by far. He never would have imagined that Percy would take time out of his busy schedule to read it himself.

Quietly as to not disturb Percy, James gets up to leave.

He isn’t as quiet as he hopes to be, though, because as soon as he stands, Percy looks over at him, surprised to see him there. James smiles at him and shifts his eyes down to the book in his hands before coming back up to his eyes, quirking his eyebrow. He can see Percy’s cheeks begin to turn pink as he attempts to hide his embarrassed frown.

James’s grin only widens. He nods his head and turns to leave, feeling Percy’s eyes on his back as he leaves the room.

\---

**16 March 1999, London, James’s Home**

James wakes up in a tangled mess of sheets and his own limbs, feeling more relaxed than he could possibly remember. He smiles as he recalls the events of last night--something that’s becoming more and more frequent these days. Not just the sex (James would be the first to say that sex with Percival was always the most euphoric experience and, while he would never encourage anyone to pursue this specific bliss, he pities everyone who will never be able to reach this height of nirvana), but the night as a whole: arriving at one of their flats, James cooking them dinner, sitting in the living room together either reading or watching telly, spending the rest of the night doing whatever they so pleased, and always ending with doing their bedtime routines side-by-side. It’s all very homey and domestic, two things James never imagined he’d be able to do, let alone actually live it.

He’s broken out of his reverie by the smell of something burning. Frowning, he quickly gets out of bed and puts on the first articles of clothing he could find on the floor.

As he reaches the kitchen, he hears a crisp, “Damn!” and walks into the sight of Percy, slightly disheveled from sleep, frowning at a blackened…something on the counter.

“Alright there, darling?” James asks, trying to suppress the biggest smile. He can’t help it, Percy just looks so damned  _ cute  _ scowling at a failed cooking attempt.

Percy looks up at him, a slight pout forming at his mouth as he realises he’s no longer alone. “I tried to make you breakfast before you woke up, but I can’t even get a bloody piece of toast right.”

James chuckles and walks over to his partner, wrapping his arms around him. “No,” he says, “you can’t get a piece of toast right.  _ But, _ ” he interrupts Percys’ indignant scoff, “it’s the thought that counts. Thank you, darling.”

He gives him a sound kiss before Percy pulls away.

“Yes, but thoughts won’t get you fed.”

“How’s this,” James starts, bringing his hands to the small of Percy’s back, “it’s Sunday, we have the day off, why don’t we go get brunch? No need to be in a kitchen at all.”

Percy looks at the burnt toast on the counter for a moment before bringing his attention back to James. “You promise?”

“I give you my word,” James smiles, and felt that warm feeling in his chest when he saw Percy return it.

“Alright, let’s go get ready, then.”

They make it back to the room, James about to start getting ready, when he notices Percy simply standing there.

“Everything alright, darling?” he asks, slightly concerned.

“Yes, it’s just…is that my shirt?”

James furrows his brows, looks down at himself, and lets out a short laugh. He beams at Percy, pleased and amused. “Huh, I suppose it is.” Walking to the mirror, he gives himself a once-over, approving of all of it. “I think I’ll keep this.”

Percy shakes his head and smiles. “Don’t you have enough of your own clothes?”

“Yes, but,” James says as he takes a whiff of the collar, “this one smells absolutely divine, don’t you think?”

The flush that appears on Percy’s neck and ears will always be a highlight of James’s day.

“You’re ridiculous,” Percy mumbles before quickly shuffling to the bathroom and locking the door.

“I think I’ll even wear this to brunch!”

James doesn’t even stop the laugh that bursts out of him as he hears a groan come from behind the door.

\---

**10 May 1999, Outside Percival’s Home**

“James, what are you doing here?”

“Merlin told me you were back.”

“I’m not going to let you in.”

“I wasn’t going to ask.”

James stands there, not saying a word. He can tell that Percy is putting on his best impassive face, hoping his usual stoic expression will put him off, but James knows better, and remains patient with him, showing neither frustration nor discomfort at his actions, pleading for Percy to realise that he’s not here to fight. So James doesn’t move, his hands folded comfortably in front of him, his eyes pouring into Percy’s with an earnest and soft intensity that’s not imposing or demanding, but calm and understanding. When James gives him the smallest smile, Percy finally relents.

“Come inside, James.”

He moves aside, and James walks in.

“Your mission was a success, I assume?” James asks.

“Yes,” Percy answers, and James is pleased to note that he follows him into the living area after closing the door. “Everything went as planned.”

“I expect nothing less from you,” James smiles softly. “May I sit?”

He hesitates, but nods, and James takes a seat on the couch while Percy sits down on the armchair on the other side.

“What are you doing here, James?” he asks again quietly.

“You left without saying goodbye. Without saying anything, really. I wanted…I wanted to know if we were alright.”

Percy’s mouth twitches, and he looks away from him. James can already hear the voices going off in Percy’s head: Was this a safe decision? Was it even a decision that could be made in the first place? Did they actually want this, or did they want a fantasy of what they thought it would be? And it’s not as though these questions aren’t warranted. James understands that being together, choosing to be a real, honest couple, is a risk, and them both being men only adds more caution into the mix.

He sees Percy swallow. “I…I’m not sure we know what we’re getting ourselves into.”

“I have no idea what the future holds,” James says bluntly. “All I know, all I can feel, is that we could be wonderful.”

“You  _ think _ we could be wonderful,” Percy insists. “I thought leaving without saying anything would be more than an answer for you.”

“On the contrary, you leaving without a word only made me know that you’re at least considering it. Otherwise, you would have flat out told me no. I know you, Percy.”

Percy, persistent as always, refuses to look at him. After a moment, James sighs and stands up, walking over and kneeling in front of him.

“And I know that you feel the same way I do about you, whether you’re going to admit it or not, stubborn man that you are.” James gently takes Percy’s hands in his own, rubbing the back of his hands with his thumbs. “But I’m not forcing you to say anything of the sort. I just want to know if you’d like to continue exploring this. Exploring us.”

“I left without a word,” Percy swallows as he continues again, “because I’m not the person you want me to be, James. I can’t be the one to make you happy. All I want is for you to be happy, and I can’t do that for you.”

James lets out a soft, breathy laugh and shakes his head. “I’m not asking you to be anyone but you, Percy. I don’t want you to be anyone but yourself. Being with  _ you _ makes me happy.”

Percy looks away again. “You can’t possibly mean that,” he murmurs.

“Try me.”

Before Percy can say anything else, James softly takes his chin in his hand and turns his head towards him, and leans in. James’s heart is pounding in his chest as he wonders if he’s overstepped, but after a moment, feels Percy’s soft,  _ so _ soft, lips press against his own. He feels Percy gently place his hands at the back of his neck, and James can’t help but smile as Percy pulls away.

“Are you,” Percy begins in a voice barely above a whisper, “are you absolutely certain this is what you want?”

“Oh, my darling Percy,” James says softly as he traces Percy’s bottom lip with his thumb, “I’ve never been more certain in my life. I want  _ you _ . That’s it. That’s all.”

“Then you have me,” Percy nods, and James’s stomach is fluttering with emotions he’s had for months. “I give you my word.”

\---

**10 September 1999, Percival’s Home**

Before he even opens his eyes, James knows it’s the middle of the night. He grumbles a bit as he stretches, then finally opens his eyes to see Percy lying there, completely awake, staring back at him.

“G’morning, darling,” James mumbles.

“Go back to sleep, James.”

As James’s eyes adjust to the darkness, he can see an emotion on Percy’s face that he can’t quite place, and worry begins to fill him. “Is everything alright?”

“Yes, everything’s fine. It’s just…” James sees Percy swallow, hesitance emitting from him.

James shuffles closer to him and maneuvers his arm so that Percy’s head is laying on his chest. “You can tell me anything.”  
“I know,” Percy mumbles. He’s playing with one of the buttons on James shirt for a moment before stopping. “You’re my best friend, James. That’s all.”

For reasons he can’t explain, James feels a lump begin to form in his throat and tears form in his eyes. He swallows it down, though, and blinks the tears away, and holds Percy closer. He kisses Percy on the top of the head. “You’re my best friend, too, darling.”

He feels Percy relax in his arms.

After a few moments, Percy dozes off, but James is still wide awake. He never knew what writers in stories meant when a character’s heart feels as though it’s about to burst, but he thinks, at this moment in time, he may finally understand.

\---

**31 December 1999, James’s Home**

Delicate, slow instrumentals fill James’s living room, the fireplace crackling and glowing softly as he and Percy sway back and forth to the music. James has never felt more comfortable in his life. If he could spend the rest of his years dancing with Percival Hadley in his arms, James could honestly say he’ll live the most gratifying and satisfying life indeed.

Only a year ago, the two of them were spending New Year’s Eve in front of a different fireplace, their relationship brand new and unexplored, the best Christmas present James had ever received in his life. Now, a year into it, James is only more ready to see where their relationship goes next.

“Did you know Harry and Merlin had been trying to set us up before Christmas last year?”

James laughs. “Did they, now? No, I never knew that. Did they tell you?”

“Well,” Percy stops and mumbles, “not exactly.”

James looks at his partner and can’t help the smile that grows on his face as he sees the familiar flush begin to creep up Percy’s neck. “Anything you’d like to share with the class, darling?”

“It was less attempts to set us up, and more…Harry asking me every other time he saw me if I’ve asked you out yet and Merlin admonishing him but then asking the same question. For months.”

“You’re adorable when you’re embarrassed, do you know that?”

Percy grumbles as he hides his faces in James’s neck. James laughs and kisses him on the cheek. “Come on, let’s sit down if you’re gonna do that.” He leads Percy to the couch and puts his arm around him. He feels Percy relax as he rests his head against his shoulder, and James feels content. This is how he wants the rest of his life to look like: him and Percy, cuddling by the fireplace, comfortable and warm and just  _ right _ .

As much as he takes pleasure in Percy’s embarrassment, James wants to thank Harry and Merlin over and over again for pushing Percy to pursue him. Even at the beginning, James knew that he could never force Percy to do anything. He could tell Percy how he feels and ask him out once, but he never asked again, knowing that he never had to ask more than once. Percy would make his decision on his own (and, perhaps, some encouragement from their friends). But knowing that even before anything had happened, they had people on their side, warmed James’s heart. 

He’s lucky. He has a man who has been by his side for over a year (both as a friend and then partner), good, trusted friends who support and care for them as he does them, and a job he wouldn’t give up for the world.

He only wishes they could do as other couples do: kiss on sidewalks, tell coworkers about the silly and adorable thing his partner did the other day, hold hands while walking to the shop, and countless other seemingly harmless gestures that everyone else in the world gets to do. But James knows how dangerous that could be. They may be spies and their lives are put at risk every time they go to work, but that’s exactly what it is: work. For the rest of his life, when he is simply James Spencer, not Agent Lancelot, it’s more dangerous to exist than it is to infiltrate a fully-armed fortress.

But as he looks down at Percy, eyes closed and serene, James knows he’d face anything if it meant being able to be in love with Percival Hadley.

And it hits him.

Everything that happened in the past year, from New Year’s Eve to burnt toast breakfasts to to their first time to their first  _ fight  _ and to that night he woke up to see Percy staring at him…it was all building up to this moment.

“Darling?”

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

He feels Percy tense. His heart is beating madly, and James wonders if Percy can feel it thundering in his chest. James begins to tense up himself, wondering if perhaps now wasn’t the time to say it.

After a few more excruciating moments, Percy says softly, “I love you, too, James.”

James smiles and holds Percy closer to him, reveling in the feel of Percy wrapping his arm around his front.

The clock on the wall chimes.

“Happy New Year, James.”

“Happy New Year, Percy.”

“Coffee?”

“Coffee sounds splendid.”

The new millennium, it would seem, will start with Percy and a cup of coffee, and James hoped that every new year following wouldn’t change a damn thing.

**Author's Note:**

> _You can hear it in the silence  
>  You can feel it on the way home  
> You can see it with the lights out  
> You are in love  
> _   
>  **\- "You Are In Love" by Taylor Swift**


End file.
